Life could always be worse.

I know that usually I write about my children and their daily endeavors. I guess in a way I still am. My childrens father is your classic example of a dead beat dad. He has not paid me a dime of support. Not that money makes or breaks the definition of a dad but money would not hurt. I take care of my children with the help of my current boyfriend. Aside from the child support issue he still stinks as a father. Before I went to get court ordered custody he would just come and go as he pleased. I did not think this was either fair or healthy for my children. He continually made promises to them that he would pick them up for the weekend or take them some where fun. He did all this knowing he did not have the means or time to do so. Not that he was working and that is what was filling up his time. Honestly I could not tell you what it was exactly that consumed so much of his time. All I know is that week after week he would not show up when he said he would. As a way of covering up for his lack of responsibility his family would come get the kids and take them to their house. He would eventually show up at some odd hour of the night and wake the kids. As if to say "Look I made it aren't you happy to see me?" That routine only flies for so long. That is why I went to court. I wanted it in writing when and where and for how long. It was supposed to cut out some of the drama The first custody order stated that he could get them when and where I deemed fit basically. I was nice and decided that every weekend from friday to sunday at his parents was sufficient. Obviously he did not think the same way I did cause that rarely happened. Once again I went back in front of the judge and told him the drama he was exposing my kids to when he did have them. He would always talk bad about myself and my boyfriend to them. So when they came home on sundays they were cold to us. Almost as if we had done something wrong. The judge decided it was best if he only had supervised visits from a CYS case worker. It was his responsibility to set these up. Something he still has not done to this day. He still calls me every once in awhile and asks how the kids are. Thoughtful right? Wrong! Calling at midnight to check on the welfare of your children is not acceptable. His family does not seem to quite get it either. They like to call him when they have my kids and invite him down to see them. Which as you know now is against the court order. I am ready to say just @#$% it all and cut them all off. We do just fine without any of them.
That is an example of just one dead beat dad out there. I am sure there are plenty more and there is no shortage of women who struggle to make it on their own. Yet some women who actually have a wonderful dad for their kids just can't seem to see it. My boyfriend is a great dad to his two kids. He pays his support, calls them everyday at the same time to see how they are. Not to mention he gets them every weekend without fail. He would love to get them more but his ex won't allow it. To her life is about money and material things. She thinks money buys happiness. If she needs something she thinks she can just call him and demand it. Now if it was something that was really needed he would have no problem but she demands things just so she doesn't have to use her support to actually support the kids. That is her spending money. How else does a woman who works half the year at maybe ten dollars and hour afford a new wardrobe every season. I will tell you how by living off of others. Yet she loves to cry poor and play the victim. She uses her kids as pawns in a game. They are nothing more than an accessory to her. It bothers me even more that she acts like this because of what I deal with on a regular basis with the father of my first four kids. I would love for her to really know what it is like to raise kids all alone. I haven't bought a new wardrobe since my parents took me shopping for new school clothes! My life is all about my kids. With or without their dad in the picture. Don't get me wrong I would love for my children to have a healthy relationship with their dad. Unfortunately that is just not going to happen anytime soon. I suppose it is hard to appreciate the things you have until they are gone. I just hope someday his ex can wake up and see what a wonderful person he is. I have given up hope on my ex. Life could always be worse. She could have my childrens father. I am thankful everyday for the life I have and wouldn't want it any other way. Life has been worse for me and I will never go back to that.